A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful but aged poodle Cuddles for company. One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch. The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep **** now!"
Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap the old poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"
Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.
"Whew!" says the leopard, "That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!"
Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.
The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says," Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"
Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?", but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says: "Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"
Moral of this story... Don't mess with old farts...age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bullshit and brilliance only come with age and experience!

Are you a two finger typer?  Or worse, do you know someone who is?

Isn't it painful to watch someone slowly type something while you watch?  You just want to grab the back of their shirt and manhandle them off the chair so you can type whateveritis in more quickly.

Most teach yourself to type programs STINK, because, no matter how you look at it, it's still a teaching tool.  The majority of these programs painstakingly go about teaching the user which fingers are to be used on which keys, and people quickly become frustrated and bored.  However, if you look at it a different way, that is from "my" point of view, I could care less if the slowpoke on the computer is typing correctly, as long as he or she is typing "quickly".  Therefore, I am pleased to recommend the game

"QWERTY WARRIORS"

There are several levels of difficulty, and the game could care less if you are two finger or two fin typer, you have to force the lousy typers in your life to play this game.

Well, having been a tea-totaler for the first of my forty years, I am no authourity on any sort of libation, though I will swear on a stack of bibles that the only beer worthy of imbibement is "Harp Lager" , a production by Guinness.

However, as it is difficult to find this particular refreshment outside of Ireland on a regular basis, and as it is only drinkable on a hot day after massive expenditure of personal calories, I have searched for cocktails or drinks that are well masked of their taste of liquor.  One of the most refreshing discoveries I've found on my search has been "Orange Flavoured vodka".  I tend to purchase whatever happens to be handy, as it all tastes the same to me.  (I did mention that I am no authourity on any sort of libation)

So, here are many sorts of things you can do with orange vodka...

I find that Orange vodka and Tropicana orange juice with ice nicely masks the alcoholic taste, and I intend to experiment with the following, as it looks nice and citrusy!  At least I will get my vitamin C requirement.

Bakunin recipe

1 1/2 oz Stoli® Ohranj vodka
1 oz Grand Marnier® orange liqueur
2 oz fresh orange juice
1/2 oz fresh lemon juice
1 dash grenadine syrup

Combine ingredients in a shaker, and shake well. Pour into a small highball glass over crushed ice, and serve.  18% (36 proof)

 Originally published 6/10/05 in Blogspot

So I like Kate Bush - hence I tend to accumulate and eventually listen to Kate related stuff, and was rereading the cover notes of her Sensual World  album which credit Alan Stivell who participated in it's recording. She sang on his album "Again", a track called Kimiad. This guy is intriguing, singing in Breton, Gaelic & French and I had largely forgotten about him; I do recall I quite liked the song "Tri Matolod" (three sailors - trois marins) which I heard originally around 25 years ago. I dug it out and gave it another listen today, and I am inspired to take a course at one of the local Universities here, in gaelic. Mind you, it might be years before I do so.

Tri martolod yaouank (tra la la, la la la la) .. it's quite stirring

6/10/05